I Confess

I stink, but not from within.
I am rude, but not arrogant.
I love to be hated, but I dont hate anyone.
I know I am a loser, but I dont bother about it.
I am shy, but not through eyes.
I know I am an actor, but I love to play depressed characters.
I have a cute smile, but I love to cry.
I know I am tasting dirt, but I love to watch stars.
I love to be alone, even when I am surrounded with people.
I prefer unexpected defeat over expected victory.
I love to go down and then show that I am not out.
I know my life lacks joys, still I long for peace and not joys.
I know I am not going to win, but I want to die as a hero.
I am broken, and I need you.

Give me Love

Its another day of frustration. Everything I should care about is going on fine, still I feel like falling in an abyss, freefall. I feel scared and demented.

I am trying to know the reason for this, is it unfullfillment of my desires or their partial fullfillment or it is because my running after them. Not caring for the small things that matter, they look really small and I feel contempt towards them sometimes. But at times like these, I feel they are my only saving grace.

I need help, love to cope with with this heavy load. I need peace and nothing else. No moments to celebrate or mourn, nobody to hurt or embrace. But, I do need hope otherwise I will be dead before I am dead.

I wish I could be born again and dream again about the small things only, which really matter.

Love and Peace